At the start of this year, I hinted on the direction that I want this blog to take. More of Morphing Monday. Less Fashion Posts.
The big fish that I want to catch is knowledge that we are good enough. We are good enough to occupy seats. Seats in the boardroom. A couch at a friend’s place. A seat at a chicken restaurant on a date. The driver’s seat as we figure out what road to take in this life. We are good enough. Not if we become slimmer, not if we become richer. Not when we become partners at an investment firm. Not when our skin clears. Not when some silly guy notices our existence. Not if, not when.
Sometimes we allow people to take our gifts and repackage them as flaws. Examining our intentions for this year. Are we fixing stuff that is not broken?
Are our intentions fuelled by feelings of inadequacy and unworthiness? Are we trying to justify our existence?
Oh yeah, the God who created the earth and the heavens mistakenly put me on this earth, so I must work hard to be seen. I need to be seen.2018 intentions-Start a business. Make truckloads of money. Make it into Forbes Magazine. The world needs to know that I am doing good otherwise I might be deported. I need this success to happen at the same speed I put my phone on silent after it goes off during a lecture. Time is running out. I need to justify my existence.
Oh, my partner, he is only with me because the girls on his league are taken. He is doing me a favour. How do I show him that I am worthy?2018 goals -Lose weight for him. Take out my brain and put in a sponge for him. Listen to Drake for him. Elevate my style for him. Do everything to make him realise that his second choice (poor me) is not too bad. Please tell me I am not too shabby. Please validate me.
Oh, friends, I don’t have any.2018 plans-let me put on my fakery amour.
Time Out- I am in no way saying that you need to live a passive life. With no effort. With no plans. Effort, yes. Straining, no.
Break Over -what I am saying is …
- Have dreams. Dreams that you own. Dreams that are rooted in knowing that you are worthy. There is nothing to prove. Do not live hiding in the shadows but do not run after what perfection seems to be either.
- Some sweet and tender effort is required in a relationship but if your partner wants you to go to Mars, dig a borehole and bring him water then there is a problem. Because, one, you don’t casually have a rocket lying around, do you? Two, if you do have a rocket, do you really want do waste your years for this quest, for this silly boy? Three, if your answer to point two is yes, is your partner Elon Musk?
- You will find your people. You do not have to be something you are not to gain friendship. Your people are waiting to embrace all the parts you are hiding. Parts that you discard as weird and boring.
What you can put into a doggie bag from this is that this life is yours. This life is your gift. You can do whatever you want to do with it. But do the work that needs to be done. Not the work that is trying to cover up inner negligence. You don’t need to prove your worth. You don’t need to justify your existence. You are here, and you belong. Bring forth fruits that you were created to produce. Carry your fruit on your crooked branches. Bloom once a year, twice a year. Bloom according to your natural cycle.
Live, it’s your gift. I don’t know how your Creator feels about you regifting your life. You might want to check His Ts & Cs.
Hair: Layla Rebecca Smith / Insta: @_curioushair_
Model: Danzel Everett / Insta: @danzelwashingtonxox
Photographer: Emma Barrow
Our fashion editiorial published by beau Nu magazine