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Suit Up.Dress Up like Audrey Hepburn.Embrace Hillary Clinton as your style inspiration.Do not mute your colours.These are the instructions that we have been given for AW17/18.A scroll through Instagram reveals that we have taken heed of the word from the fashion masters.
Well ,the masters have made sure we have no other option.They have filled stores with red suits ,blue suits ,checked suits ,red coats and red boots.Red ,red ,red.Everything is red.I am a fan of red but this bloody madness needs to stop.
Anyway ,here is my guide to power dressing
- Wear wide leg jeans.Jeans are a power item because they have worked their way up from being a uniform for manual workers in the late 1800s to rebellious youth picking it up in the 1950s to being Steve Job’s uniform.Jeans are for you ,for me ,for us all but we need to stop pretending that jeans are comfortable.Once you get into them you are imprisoned.The stiffness of the material guides your legs on how far and wide they should stretch.There is zero fluidity.I don’t mean stretchy denim I mean the real stuff.Jeans take away comfort and so does gaining power.Well ,that is what I would like to believe-that power doesn’t allow you do to as you please.
Note that the only power I have is over my almost 2 year old niece.
- Wear a white flowy blouse.To remind you that power is fickle.In the morning it’s all sparkly and crisp ,by lunch time it has turmeric stains that will never fade away.One wear and you have to downgrade the white blouse to ‘in the house clothing’.One act of misusing power and the world tosses you away into the background like the white blouse ,like Tiger Woods and whoever cropped into your mind.
- Wear a headscarf.Sometimes you need something to filter out the nonsense in your surroundings so that your mind is not contaminated.To sieve people’s opinions.Your brain needs more covering ,wrap around 10 scarfs even.You might get some ear pain but that is a small price to pay for having an uncontaminated mind.
- Wear heels.A reminder to not run after all the world has to offer,you don’t want to fall.
As you can tell the above is a bit of nonsense.There is no such thing as power dressing.You either have the power or you don’t.You give life to your clothes ,your clothes don’t give you life.Your clothes don’t give you power.